Thursday, May 16, 2013

Style and the Serenity Prayer


Most of us have heard this at least once in our life.  This morning it hit me how this sweet prayer can apply to our personal styles, especially for those of us who've left our twenties in the dust!!

In my opinion style ought to be about what I love about myself, not about what I want to change. So, in my daily life of deciding what to wear and how to wear it, decisions are being made.    Am I going to dress to hide what I've come to not like about myself (or often, what I've been TOLD not to like about myself) OR am I going to dress with acceptance, serenity and with an eye to showcase my features and personality?

We really CAN'T look like whatever we want....

We live in a society that tells us that we can look however we want.  Women are lauded for their parts not their whole and we think that if we work out the way Gwen Stefani does, we can have her legs or eat like Gwyneth Paltrow, we will have her figure.  But wise women have figured out by now, that's just not true!  I am me.  You are you.  And we can spare ourselves much time, grief and frustration by accepting what can't change and changing what we can....but as the prayer says, the key is knowing the difference!

I can change my size, but I have to accept my body shape.  All the dieting and working out in the world isn't going to change my basic body shape.  So instead of bemoaning my muscular legs, I can show them off in above-the-knee skirts and fitted jeans!

I can change my hair style, but I have to accept my hair texture.  It does me no good to take a picture of Camilla Belle to my stylist and say, "This is what I want" because our hair texture is different.  I may get the cut, but I'll never have the look!

I can change the way I apply my makeup, but I have to accept my face.  Yes.  That's right.  I have to accept the shape of my eyes, the roundness of my cheeks, the "little too much teeth" grin that I get when I'm really excited!  I know.  I know.  There's cosmetic surgery.  But there are plenty of examples of women trying to get "just the right" face, who ended up getting something else entirely!

I can change the way I dress, but I have to accept my age.  Ouch!  Now I'm just meddling, aren't I?!  Here's the dirty little secret we sometimes don't want to acknowledge to ourselves:  my age IS a factor in what I wear.  There. It's out there and I said it!  :)  There are some things that will look ridiculous on me at my age.  Certain types of shoes.  Super short skirts or shorts.  Low rise jeans.  A LOT of graphic print tees.  I can try to dress like a 20 year old all I want.  But it's never going to change the fact that I'm 46!

So what's the key in all this?  Acceptance.  

Acceptance of our features.  Our bodies.  Our age.  Our personalities.  And with that acceptance, an embrace.  I'm not talking about a grudging acceptance and having the scooter store on speed dial.  I'm talking about a celebration!   Celebrating what makes each of us unique.   Celebrating our personal style that's built around flattering our assets, not camouflaging our perceived "problem areas".


Changing what we can.  Accepting what we can't.  And having enough wisdom to know the difference!  How's that for a style devotional?!


By the way, if you've happened to stumble here without ever meeting Pam (I can't imagine!!), please do yourself a favor and give her blog a read.  Her blog is prolific when it comes to celebrating one's age and embracing change!  And another FABULOUS read is Paula!  Paula is a gorgeous example of self acceptance and wearing it well!


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15 comments:

  1. Wise, wise advice, Serene! I love the way you presented this! It is nice to see your blog pop up again in my list!! Thanks for your sweet comment on my post about GIGI leaving! :)

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    1. Thanks Pam! As I get older, the Serenity Prayer actually means something to me now! LOL I finally get it!

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  2. Wonderful thoughts here, Serene. I agree, the challenge is knowing the difference between what we can and cannot change. And of course accepting the latter with grace and humor. You have those qualities in abundance! xoxoxoxo

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    1. Patti, sometimes it's tough to know the difference, eh? I'm still working on that AND the grace and humor too!

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  3. Awww shucks Serene! Thanks for the sweet mention. And ditto to you GF! It is about acceptance and then just get confident girl! Xoxo

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    1. You're so welcome Paula! You have such fabulous style for ANY age! And your confidence just radiates!!

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  4. Excellent post Serene--and so so true. I wish I had the self-confidence I have in this fat 50+ body when I was a skinnier 20 year old!!

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    1. Oh my gosh! You're so right! I was a size 5 and riddled with body angst. Now I'm a 10/12 and feel fabulous!!!

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  5. This prayer has been a sort of mantra in our household over the years...and I love how you have applied it to self-acceptance.

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    1. Thanks Terri! It definitely means more to me now than ever before!

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  6. I LOVE this prayer!
    A very thoughtful post...thank you!

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  7. What a wonderful post, Serene! I love your writing-dead on!
    Hugs,
    Reva

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Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment! ~Serene