Friday, May 13, 2011

…if you were born alone on an island…



All Thrifted…..skirt-vintage and altered, top-silk, shoes-nine west, belt – TJ Maxx (not thrifted…oops!)


If you were born on an island, alone and never met another person; what would you think of yourself?  Would you wish your hair were different?  Would you want to be taller?  Shorter?  Thinner?  Would you consider your legs to be too big?  Would you question whether your butt was too big?  Not big enough?  Would you be cool with your curly hair?  Or would your straight hair drive you nuts? 

What about your style?  If a trunk of clothes washed ashore, what would form your likes?  Your dislikes?  Would your station in life be okay with you?  If you ate mangos everyday, would that be okay?  Would you feel wealthy or poor.  Or either actually?  Would you think you were pretty?  If a mirror were in that trunk of clothes, would the reflection please you?

The question is, if you had no one to compare yourself to, what would you think about yourself?  Consider this.  Most of our angst, body image, frustrations, fears, insecurities and even jealousies can all be traced to some kind of comparison.  We compare ourselves or our situation to someone…..anyone and then we judge ourselves by how we think we measure up in that comparison. 

Before you dismiss this, think about it.  Why do we not like something about ourselves?  Where does most of our unhappiness come from?  To what do we credit the body issues that we have?  If we never had anyone or anything to measure ourselves by, could we find or create inadequacies in ourselves?   If I were born alone on an island with no one to compare myself to, what would ever make me think that everything about myself was not normal, or not good enough? 

If I never saw a size 6, how would I know to be unhappy with my size 10?  If I never saw another human being, I wouldn’t LEARN to pick myself apart in a dissection for imperfections.   So let’s just pretend we never saw anyone else and just be tickled with the way we are!


  1. You look beautiful!! love this outfit!!

  2. I'm with 'ya sister. What's so bad about being a 10? This is coming from somebody that was a 18 down to a 6 which I couldn't live with and is now quite happy in my 53 yr old size 10 body!

  3. This is a brilliant post Serene. I think this way of think applies not only to body image and fashion but everything, every little aspect of our lives. This is a tangent but I remember reading a novel about a girl who had been the victim of a terrible tragedy and everyone judged her because of what had happened to her and inside she was struggling with simply surviving this horrible incident and she thought that if she could be away from people she could bear her pain so much better and heal...ok, does that make any sense or relate in any way what you wrote??:) I just mean that so much of what we feel about any given situation in our own lives can be determined by others. It's sad. To get back to physical appearance, I know so many, too many, beautiful women who don't see their own beauty...I'm pretty sure something in our society is seriously at fault for this.


    Hope you have a great day Serene.:)

  4. This is a wonderful post. I would need to read it several times because I need to get it burned into my brain. It speaks to me.

  5. Very logical conclusion and very good point indeed.I will compare no more.The hell with it!

  6. Oh, what a wonderful post. I try very hard not to compare myself to others, because I know that's a slippery slope. I am actually quite happy with my body and my shape, but then I feel a bit guilty that I'm not all angsty about it because I feel like there is more pressure to be *unhappy* with yourself than there is encouragement to be happy with your body.

  7. And even if you were in another culture, where there were different values, then you would aspire to those. I like to think along those lines--if there were no peer pressure, no cultural values. Lets go to that island. Love, Paula

  8. As wise as ever, my dear Serene.
    I love the way you pair animal print. It is my next big challenge.
    Besos from Berlin.

  9. In my busyness, I just saw this post....great thoughts...I always tell my students that COMPARISONS KILL....they are deadly and rob us of our joy.
    You look great BTW and no one compares to Serene...Love ya lots!


Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment! ~Serene